Last week, a co-worker informed me of an event he was working at and invited me to come watch a Q and A and showing with Tommy Wiseau of The Room. This film is rated one of the worst movies ever made and it is nothing shy of that. The movie stars Tommy with a cast of no-names who "act" in such a way that it almost seems like they are aware of how bad the movie really is. It's a awful story with a dialogue to match. It is full of cliche scenes and includes things that "good ol' 'mericans" do like play football, even if the participants are 3 feet away from each other. It was shot with a digital and film camera because Tommy didn't know the difference. He claims to be from the USA but I am highly doubtful of this. He has an accent like no other American and his English is on par with an immigrant. I feel as if he learned english by watching porn. The only way I can describe how he speaks is as if he were a dumb Werner Hertzog. All the arrogance but non of the intellect. you can learn more about his background through Wikipedia
. I was turned on to the movie by two different friends who knew not of each other and told me I had to watch this movie. Being a fan of obscenely terrible movies, I rented it from netflix. Within the first 3-5 mins there was a sex scene, giving a full back shot of Tommy also know to my friend Nathan as "a piece of Lithuanian Jerky". I quickly paused the movie, called my other friend Jesse and asked if he had suggested a porn because I was watching this with my wife and sister and it was very awkward. He reassured me it wasn't and to continue watching but to be warn there were more disgusting adult situations to follow. He was exactly right and they were very long scenes. It was gross.
The event had four showings. I went to the fourth. I had seen this movie at least five times prior, mainly because I would show friends how much of a train wreck it was. Most were reluctant and for good reasons. I met some friends before so we could grab some food and drinks. We showed up to the movie theater and were surprised to see Tommy right there by the doors signing autographs and taking pictures. He was being quite the ham. It's as if he couldn't get enough of the attention and got in every chance to show off. He was wearing a cut off satin shirt with a leather vest chaps and pants with chains and loops. Something that you might find at an S&M shop or Hot Topics. (btw i've never been to an S&M shop, but it's what I imagined) We got up to him and I got my picture taken. I had a few beers so I wasn't letting any inhibitions stop me. I told him to flex his muscles and i did the same, while i held on to his bicep. It did feel like jerky!!! I was disgusted to be honest. I was walking away when Tommy insisted that the friends I came with all get in the picture and he demanded a person in line to take the photo. They hopped in and we got it. It was getting close to show time so we continued to our seats.
As the Q & A was beginning, my friends and I were conversing about the movie. On friend hadn't seen it at all and the other only partially because of how bad it was. The announcer introduced Tommy with an intro fit for a good director, I couldn't believe what i was hearing and was wondering if this was the same person. Tommy's name was announced and he came running down the isle just like a WWF wrestler (wwe now) would have, ready to fake wrestle with our questions. He talked in person just like his script. It was obvious he had written this movie. He was playing the crowd who were all major supporters of him, one in which had seen the movie over 50 times. I was clearly at a pep rally for a jerk off's ego. One by one the questions were asked and Tommy chose to either answer them or just reject the question and move on if he didn't like it. I thought this was kind of bullshit. He's trying to keep a mysterious personality but it's so lame that I barely care. I really just want to know where he is really from. So I mustered up the courage and asked. . He rejected it of course but what kind of pissed me off was that someone in the audience (you can't hear it in the video) told me to fuck off. I responded as i did and went to my seat. Tommy deflated my love for the movie mainly because he was milking the teat of a pathetic cow. The only thing he has going for him is a movie that he made sincerely and everyone laughed at it. By the way he called it a black comedy after the reaction wasn't what he expected. He's a hack and is trying to play it off as if he indented it to be this way. I'm calling him out on it. It would take a epic genius in order to pull this off and even then, that person would give you some sort of hint that it was all a hoax. I think he's just trying to get as much out of this as possible and float for the rest of his life. More power to him and we'll really see if his next movie ever comes out because it IS a comedy. I'm sure the jokes will be contrived and unbearable. I never had respect for the guy, I guess i just wanted him to be a little bit more humble. He's very lucky to be where he is and god knows there are millions of people more talented who could use the hype.
